Realization of the Day: I'm Human

January 11 is the day that my life changed forever. I came to the realization that we are not immortal; that one day, we will not walk this earth, and we will not be able to see the sunshine or smell fresh grass. I came to the realization that life is, in fact, going by fast...what do we have to show for it? We spend so much time hating on each other rather than loving each other, and we take for granted what good people can do for us.

I'm human; I bleed, I cry, I laugh, I feel. After January 11th and the devastation in Haiti, I have come to the conclusion that it is indubitably time to live each day as if it is my last day on this here earth. No one knows who is going to be here tomorrow, and at this time more than any we should be reaching out and touching one another instead of breaking each other down. This semester, I'm looking forward to staying persistent with my studies and having as much fun as I have the past few semesters I've been at New Paltz. It's time for me to keep on smiling, and to continue breathing air and life until it's time to part.

Realization of the Day: I'm Jealous

"Tell me why you in my B-I-Z

You gon' make me get my vaseline

You don't wanna catch the 3rd degree

Back up I need fifty feet

I don't think you really want it"

-Danity Kane, Want It

Ok, I'll admit: I'm a jealous bitch. I do get a little worrisome when hoochies look at my sig other (significant other) a certain way. I do tense up at the thought of someone giving him a compliment. But y'know what? I can't be but so mad. I mean not to be cocky (I'm just saying what I experience) but there do be times where some guys may tell me "hey, you're very attractive" or "hey, so what's good with you?" It's up to me to know that words are, indeed, just words and compliments can be harmless. It's all in the matter of what actions are being taken after those compliments are made, which none have been made so life is good under the sun.

Cutting straight to the point, for 2010 I plan on learning how to filter my jealousy; not being blind, but knowing how to ignore the advances that other wo/men may make towards him. And I'll admit, prior relationship experiences can be the cause of my jealous nature, but it's to put Sankofa into the playing field. I should be able to look at the past, learn that their qualities has nothing to do with his, and be able to move forward. It's time to loosen up the ropes, and it starts now.

New Year, New Ashes

"When your head is in a certain place
Nobody around to make you safe
Stand strong and you will grow
Oh
Wait till you see my smile"

-Alicia Keys, Wait 'Til You See My Smile

So although I'm a few days late, I would love to wish everyone a happy new year!! New Year's was very special to me this year. I spent it with my best friends and it was amazing just laughing and talking with them again. I haven't done that in quite some time with school and everything. Not to mention the $3 Smirnoffs hit the spot :).

With a new year came a new sense of mind and soul. For the past few days, I've been in quite high spirits if I do say so myself, and I really do feel as if I can make it through this year. I wake up every morning/afternoon and don't mind being up, whether I'm in the house or going to the store. Maybe the new year is a placebo, and if it is then it's working.

I still have quite a few friends that I need to catch up with. I'm not leaving until I've seen most to all of the important people that have graced my life in one form or another. And hopefully this dude stops making 2 Girls 1 Cup references...or I'mma give him something to refer to...Other than that, my relationship is steadily heading back on track the more I learn how to handle one's busy schedule and climb to success.

As I have referred to countless times, a phoenix always dies in the fire and rises in the ashes. 2009 has been my fire; it's time for the ashes of 2010 to bring me some prosperity and accomplishment. Wait 'til they see my smile...